wait. what happened?

hello world!



zoe is 1 YEAR OLD.  what happened? how did we get here?

so much has happened since the last time i posted, but here are ten things:

1.  zoe can now, say several words.  her favorites are: dada, umma (mom in korean), mam-ma (food in korean), and dawa (darra).

2.  her hair.  its curly and fine.  a true combination of jake's and my hair.

3.  she is still fairly tall, head-large, feet-xlarge, eyes-hazel inside/grayish rim.

4.  zoe smiles w a scrunched up nose and it kills every    single    time.

5.  she finally got teeth at about 10 months!  she has four teeth and i think more are sprouting bc girl isnt sleeping.  teething is always the culprit, right?

6.  bc she is such an active baby, i was sure she was going to walk before her 1st bday.  she's been standing on her own for quite a while, but still not walking.

7.  ok. so jake and i wanted to "limit screen time" you know, bc research somewhere out there by some screen time expert dude said to do so.  mmm that went to shit pretty fast.  it might be that she watches k dramas w my mom while im at work, or it might also be that jake and i are on our phones a lot too, or it might be that im constantly shoving the phone in front of her to capture her EVERY move, but it happened, she loves the phone. oh well. she also loves books and animals.  she'll be ok.

8.  wrapping up my first year as a pumping/working mom has been pretty cool.  i thought i was going to stop nursing when i started work, but i figured id pump for a month to see how it went.  its been 6 months and tomorrow will mark my last day pumping at work.  i did it! i only got walked in on once. i would do it 100 times over again for her.  but cleaning the pumping parts?  NO just NO.  worst feeling at the end of the night is remembering you didn't wash your pump parts for the next day.  does anyone feel me?!!!

9.  we lost our dear uncle a few weeks ago.  i took zoe to her first funeral.  it saddens me to know that she never got to know him, but oh the stories she'll hear about him.  i know he's smiling now. we miss you, uncle.

10.  a family wedding is the best.  we celebrated a new chapter for our cousin devi and her husband hunter.  the wedding was perfect.  one of devi's big bros gave a speech that really moved me to tears. hoping that one day, zoe will have a sibling who can write a 4 page speech for her too.  a side note about this most perfect wedding:  i slipped and ate it really hard in front of everyone right before the ceremony started.  i got up really quickly after everyone gasped.  jake said he was just really glad i wore underwear bc i was spread eagle.  oops.



waiting for our baby seemed to take forever, but she's already one in a couple days.

prior to having zoe, i knew i would love her more than i can ever imagine.  i knew that some days would be hard.  i knew that other days would be really, really hard.  i knew i wasn't going to sleep much.  i knew that that our lives would change.

after having zoe, i learned that total exhaustion is a lesser degree of what (most, including us) new parents experience.  i learned that empathy, above all other emotional needs, is so, so important esp for a new mom.  i learned that motherhood is empowering.  i learned that, in the most honest way, everyday, every moment is a real gift.

[i wrote this post prior to the orlando shooting and, today, on zoe's actual birthday, i can't stress the above statement enough.  every moment is a gift and i will do everything in my power to show zoe that. much love to orlando.]

jake and i are starting a birthday tradition for zoe by recording a short message for her so that by the time she turns 18, she can have a collection of video messages from us, which we KNOW she will watch every day in her dorm room, crying hysterically because she misses us so much.

happy first birthday, zoezoe.



LOTS of photos

baby proofing done right

almost 6 months apart <3

at our fave breakfast spot

my mom sends me photos of zoe while im at work.  

my two other babies are in town!

sometimes we take weird selfies and send them to daddy

the curls~~~

zoe's deep obsession w dogs.  

bodega bay to get crab sandwiches

they see me rollin', hatin'...

some snapshots of zoe's dohl!  

zoe's auntie took photos of the whole thing, can't wait to share them.

donut themed

print by my cousin's cousin, Jess, who i call second cousin, even tho i know that's not right.

her first bite of donut glory

zoe's doljabi.  she chose money twice!  i ain't mad at that.

took zoe to the beach for her bday today.  

her face

i was there too. 

bday pool party for one.  thanks geemo and uncle j

all smiles.  :)))))